12 Surefire Signs You’re On the Path to Burnout

BurnoutThere’s an epidemic in our society that is stripping the joy and fun out of life, and often we can’t even see that it’s happening. It’s called burnout, and you might be a victim of this insidious ailment that has afflicted so many.  Here are 12 sure-fire signs that you’re on the path to burnout (even if you don’t know it yet).

  1. You’re feeling stressed all the time
  2. You’re short-tempered and impatient
  3. You’re not getting enough sleep
  4. You’re not exercising enough
  5. You lost touch with friends for weeks or months at time
  6. You’re not having enough (any?) fun or you overdo it on fun in short bursts and then have to recover
  7. You don’t feel happy or joyful most of the time
  8. Your schedule so busy that you have no room for the intimate relationship you desire… or the one that you have
  9. You crash or tune-out using drugs, alcohol, shopping, working, or Netflix binge watching
  10. Your kids say things like “Mommy why are you working all the time?” and “Daddy will you play with me” and you keep on working
  11. You isolate yourself because it takes too much effort and energy to be with people
  12. You know something’s wrong but you regularly think to yourself:
  • …“I can do this, hang tough.”
  • …”I can handle it”
  • …”It’s not that big a deal.”
  • …”I’ll be through the crunch next week.” (but you’ve said that 5+ times in the past 2 months)
  • …”It’ll sort itself out.”
  • …”If I ask for help people will think I’m weak.”

I say burnout is insidious because it creeps up on us, as we’re passionately providing for our families or going after our dreams. We are pulled by the calling to do more, be more, and earn more.  We’re enticed by the shiny things in the shop windows, and on TV. We’re trained by the media to never truly appreciate who we are RIGHT NOW, and what we have in our lives RIGHT NOW, but rather to be dissatisfied with never being or having enough, because then we wouldn’t buy as much and keep the economic growth engine chugging.

Or maybe you’re just striving to get by, working two or more jobs and still not able to get ahead. Or you’re building a business that never seems to get to that magical level where there’s a steady stream of income coming in?

If this is you, then you’re probably on the path to burnout and you’re probably in denial about it. I was.

I crashed a few weeks ago. I just couldn’t take it anymore and I broke down and admitted that I was burning out.  This was especially hard because I am the expert that clients come to when they are on the path to burnout!  It was a tough truth-telling session with myself, and my coach.

I have been trying to do it all for years.  There have been smooth times and there have been rocky times, but for the most part, most of the time, it’s really, really stressful, and I’ve been over-working and under-funning my life.  And all the while, I’ve not made the time to create all the powerful programs and events that I so want to offer to all of you to create more personal resilience in your life!

You see that’s the problem – we think we have to do it all, but in the end we’re not really doing the stuff that really matters and makes a difference. Something’s gotta change.

If this blog is hitting home for you, I invite you to take an inventory of your life for the next week.  Notice how you’re compensating and offsetting the heavy workload and stress. Notice what you’re missing out on, what you’ve settled for as being normal or necessary.  Pay attention to your body and signals it’s sending you. And take a look at how well you’re meeting your personal needs.

Join me next time to read Part 2 of this blog to learn what you can do to get off the path to burnout and create joyful, passionate work that makes a difference in the lives of those you serve!

As always, I welcome your feedback. Please leave a link back to your own blog if you have one, via the commentluv feature here on the site.

Until next time,

Sue

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When the Next Blackout Hits Will you be Ready?

self sufficiencyWhen the Next Blackout hits Will You be Ready? Here in North America we’ve been bombarded with winter storms and extreme temperatures this winter. It seems that almost every week there is a city or state in the US declaring a state of emergency due to heavy snow, winds, and electricity outages.  We had our turn over the holidays here in Canada with hundreds of thousands of people across Ontario, Quebec and the Maritimes without power for days, many of them for over a week. There were thousands of cold, hungry and miserable families who eventually relocated to a friend’s home, a hotel, or a public warming station.

This will happen again.

Are you going to be ready next time?

Weather patterns are becoming more extreme with climate change, and our old electricity grid is fragile and vulnerable to wind, ice, lightning and snow storms.

Blackouts are the new normal.

So what will you do to ensure your family is safe, warm and well fed during the next natural disaster?  Short of planning an evacuation location, building resilience and self-sufficiency is the only way to ensure peace of mind knowing you can weather any chaos, in the comfort of your own home.

For some, a self-sufficiency plan involves knowing their family will be able to thrive for 2 weeks without power and basic services.  For others, their dream of self-sufficiency is to be living off the grid, able to meet all their family’s basic needs for a year or more!

It takes fore-thought and planning and yes, change; doing research, uncovering the options, and making sound decisions.  Your self-sufficiency plan is not something to be taken lightly.  It could mean the difference between your family’s comfort and safety, and their panic and heartbreak.

Leadership Unleashed is proud to announce the new Earth Wisdom Living program,

PLAN YOUR DREAM

90-Days to Create Your Customized Plan for a Self-Sufficient Way of Life

It’s an online group training program that you can take from the comfort of your home or office.  We walk you through every aspect of planning for your family’s self-sufficiency, so you can build a plan that aligns with your core values, vision, budget, risk tolerance, and sense of urgency.

EARTH WISDOM LIVING is for you if you’re aware of the rapid and risky changes in the world and you want to live with a smaller footprint, more connected to the land, and in more empowered and resourceful way, but you’re not sure where to start, you’re overwhelmed with the options or you feel trapped by our current culture’s lifestyle options.

Plan you Dream starts March 4th, 2014!  Come see what it’s all about by clicking here. You can register online and secure your family’s safety. It’s that easy.

I welcome your feedback!  Please leave a link back to your own blog too via the commentluv feature here on the site.

Until next time,

Sue

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The 3 Beliefs to Master Change

Conquering changeHave you ever felt like you’re between a rock and a hard place?  Like you don’t have any options and you’re stuck?  We can feel frustrated and powerless in the place.  And my suggestion to you is that there are ALWAYS options when you have the 3 beliefs to master change.

1.  I can create my experience.  Every moment of every day we perceive the world around us as a reflection of what’s going on in our psyche. In other words, who we are at the core impacts how we experience the world.  So if you want to change your experience, change your Self.  Do the work – whether it’s personal growth, spiritual, or professional development – do the work to transform yourself, in order to change your experience of life.  I worked with a woman who had a challenging relationship with her father in her family-based business.  While in my office that day, she transformed her perspective and understanding of that relationship, and that was the day her relationship with her dad changed for good.  Do the inner work, to create a better life experience.

2.  I can choose how I respond. With every experience, we have a choice how we respond, but first we must believe we have that choice. A very wise man once said to me “No one can make you feel anything!!” This can be a difficult pill for some to swallow because it’s human nature to blame those around us for how we’re feeling.  You get to choose your feelings by choosing your thoughts, beliefs, and physiology… unless you want to continue to give away your power and not take responsibility for your life.  Choose your response (consciously) or react (unconsciously). The choice is yours.

3.  I can handle whatever comes my way. …and I will be ok. This belief is at the heart of empowerment and resilience. Every time I learn a skill, I’m empowered. Every time I adapt to a new circumstance, I’m resilient. Every time I lean on my network for support, or tap a new resource, or resolve an old pain, I’m strengthening my foundation and increasing my flexibility.  The more you stretch and grow and flex, the better able to handle unexpected events you become.  Think of it like building a muscle. You build muscle by working it regularly in a cyclic pattern of stretch-and-heal. Stretch into the new every day, and you’ll be better able to handle whatever comes your way!

I’d love your feedback! And don’t forget to leave a link back to your own blog too if you have one via the commentluv feature here on the site.

Until next time,

Sue

 

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Change Scares Me. I Hate Change.

people who hate changePeople have been telling me that change is scary; that they’d do anything to avoid it, they hate change so much.

“Apple made me finally update my phone. I hate change.”

“I got a promotion. Change scares me.”

“Looking at old photos depressed me. I hate change.”

“Finally dyeing my hair. It’s gonna be red. Change scares me.”

“New people on the team. I hate change.”

Now I know there may be a few of you out there who actually like change and get excited about it, but you need to know that you are quite rare. Most people don’t like change.

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3 Reasons Why People Stay Busy – The Busy Syndrome

bigstock-Balance-Spheres-Shows-Balanced-51984634a We’re heading into our busiest time of year, the holiday season, and yet, don’t you find that it’s busy all year long?!  As the commercials recently are saying, Is that good busy? Or not so good busy?  I’ve noticed some interesting things we do and say that are completely counter to what we truly want…something I call the ‘busy syndrome’. “Hi, how are you?” “Oh, I’m SO busy!” <smile>  (as if that’s a good thing) Sometimes it is a good thing, and, often it’s not.  What are your life balance goals?  What are your work or business goals?  Do they include being busy every waking hour? Is it your desire to be booked up with work, volunteer, and family commitments every day and most evenings? Who wants that? Yet, most of you have built your lives this way.  Why? Read more

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The 3 Causes of our Anger Management Epidemic

Anger management tecniquesAlthough it’s the butt of many jokes and the basis for a comedy movie with Jack Nicholson and a recent TV series with Charlie Sheen, anger management has become one of the most socially-dysfunctional, yet preventable issues in our culture.  Have you given any thought to the causes of this anger management epidemic?

Why do we have road rage, and restraining orders, and anger management classes in elementary schools?!

Anger is avoided like a disease, until it explodes.

There are 3 reasons why western cultures can’t manage anger…

  1. No one taught us how to be with anger. If you grew up in some European families, you’d hear yelling and arguing on a daily basis, without hard feelings, and always ending in hugs. In North America, we weren’t taught how to be angry because anger wasn’t acceptable. Period.
  2. We have limiting beliefs about anger. Most of us we’re raised to ignore or suppress our natural anger because we were told that “Good girls don’t get angry.” And “Angry boys are mean.” You may also hold a limiting belief that ‘anger is dangerous’ because you experienced violence with anger growing up. The possible beliefs about anger that are no longer serving you are endless.
  3. Old, residual anger from the past has not been managed so it comes rushing forward in the moment we feel the slightest bit of anger, and amplifies our emotion and our reaction. Usually it’s uncontrollable. And usually we regret it afterwards.

What most of us never learned is that…

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The 3 Secrets to Positive Thinking

positive thinking I thought it might be helpful to share 3 secrets to positive thinking, because everyone wants to be happy.  Everyone likes to be around positive people.  Everyone likes a happy ending.

So why is there so much focus on doom and gloom in the world?  The news is all about crime, disasters and war.  Bosses and teachers talk about what’s wrong with the work but rarely what is good.  People are filled with fear and dread, and are living their lives wondering when the other shoe is going to drop, or “what next?!”.

It takes focus and determination to avoid being sucked in to the negativity around you.  And sometimes you forget that…

You are always at choice about how you think and feel.

And you can choose to think positively any time.

  1. AIM. Know what you want.  It feels good to get clear on what you want.  Often we know what we don’t want, but we don’t take the next steps to say, “if not that, then what?”.  We experience contrast every day that can be used to get clearer and clearer on our dreams and goals.  Whenever you notice something you don’t want, turn it into a new detail about what you do want.  Aim.
  2. ENERGIZE. Choose your thoughts using your emotions.  Use your emotional guidance system to tell you when to change your thinking.  If it feels bad, let the thought go.  If it feels good, focus on it. Daydream about what you want, as often as you can, so that your positive emotions will drive your behavior toward what you want.
  3. BELIEVE. Expect it.  Set the intention for it.  Believe it will be.  Expect it to happen any moment.  The anticipation is not only fun, but it feels good too.  Some people don’t want to get their hopes up in case they end up disappointed, but then they spend the entire time being negative about it.  Wouldn’t it be better to get excited and believe and anticipate it, until it arrives?

So, go ahead, turn that negative thought into a positive one and enjoy yourself.

Life’s more fun that way!

Let me know what you think! I would love your feedback. And don’t forget to leave a link back to your own blog too if you have one via the commentluv feature here on the site.

Until then, be resilient.

Sue

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Are You Hiding Your Truth?

speak your truth

We human beings are notorious for skirting around the truth.  We are so concerned with ‘keeping the peace’ and wanting everyone to like us, that we completely give away our personal power by hiding our truth.

“I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself?” 

Oriah Mountain Dreamer, The Invitation

Because if we can’t live our truth then what are we living?  Someone else’s expectations.  Our own “shoulds”.  Society’s drone norms.

You are meant to live your truth.  In its highest form. Which will be constantly evolving as you expand.

When you live your truth, you must also speak it.  And that truth may not be popular. It may not be pretty or neat or easy to swallow.

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Our Most Powerful Hidden Asset – The Unconscious Mind

unconscious mindHave you heard that you have an unconscious mind? I teach my clients how to utilize the most powerful hidden asset that we have… the unconscious mind.  It is responsible for our actions and behaviour, and takes care of our body’s autonomic functions while we focus on other things. In fact, this best-kept-secret-to-getting-the-results-you-want is the single biggest factor in driving the results you get in your life.  So when clients come to me stuck in their stuff, missing the mark, and repeating old patterns, I tell them to “Use your mind… not that mind, the other mind!”

The unconscious mind makes up 90% of your mind’s capacity!  And it drives your behaviour!

Your Conscious Mind is the goal-setter and

your Unconscious Mind is the goal-getter

Wouldn’t it be useful to know how to leverage this part of your mind so you can get the results you really want?

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How Well do you Share Your Emotions?

How well do you share your emotions? When the end of your life is near and you are on your deathbed, will you have regrets?

Bronnie Ware wrote a book about what she learned from being a palliative care nurse for years called “Top Five Regrets of the Dying”, and one of those regrets struck a chord with me…

I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings

Because I see clients every week who have shunned, ignored and repressed their emotions, to the point where they are not expressing themselves truly or fully in the world.

Our society doesn’t like emotion. We teach our children to ‘buck up’ and ‘don’t cry’.  It’s considered inappropriate to show anger at work, even when it’s justified.  It’s not acceptable to be afraid, and we are all expected to feel guilty all the time.

Women who show too little emotion are “bitches” and the ladies who express too much emotion are labelled as “too emotional”.  Men are taught not to show fear or sadness at all, and only moderate amounts of anger are allowed.

Healthy emotional strategies are simply not understood and not taught to us as we are growing up, so we see all manner of emotional blind spots that are holding us back as adults. In addition, all of this repressed emotional energy has to go somewhere, and when it isn’t expressed in healthy natural ways, it shows up as dis-ease in the body; chronic pain and other ailments are the result of bottled up emotion. So…

I challenge you to tell someone how you really feel. Today.

And if you would like to get to strengthen your emotional foundation, you’ll want to know about the Resilient Mindset self-study program: Take Charge of Your Mind and Your Emotions to Secure your Bouncebackability.

I’d love your feedback! And don’t forget to leave a link back to your own blog too if you have one via the commentluv feature here on the site.

Until next time,

Sue

 

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